Birds have always been one of my dream companions. So, imagine my surprise when Lee – my Indian Ringneck Parrot – first arrived and he wasn’t exactly the most affectionate Bird, especially when compared to the ones you might see on social media.
THE DIFFICULT BEGINNING
Arriving at almost two years old, raised with little human interaction, he came to me as a scared juvenile, a little white Bird who was suspicious of every single move I made. Gaining his trust wasn’t easy in the slightest. It took time, patience, and more love than I thought I had to give to such a small Bird.
But slowly, with the help of a stick, an apple, and some daily training, he opened up. Bit by bit, we bonded, and before long, he was a part of nearly every moment of my daily life.
THE COMPANY
Lee wasn’t just an ordinary Bird in my room; he was my closest companion. He would perch beside me while I worked, chew on my chair, chatter away as I cleaned, grind his beak when he got sleepy, and keep me company through quiet nights.
He had simple joys: munching on crisp apple slices, snacking on corn, playing with his wooden toys, and working extra hard for seeds.
At times, he was stubborn: He refused to go back inside his cage and broke into dance at the most inconvenient times. But it was those quirks that made him so special.
Looking back, I’d give anything to relive those small frustrations, even just for a day.
THE FIRST WORD
One of my favorite memories of him was when he spoke his first word. Before that, I would do a Mr. Bean style of training and play parrot, teaching Youtube videos on loop whenever I left so he wouldn’t be lonely.
My whole family thought I was wasting my time, and that what I was doing was annoying and loud. Other people told me it’s unlikely that he’d talk, given how he wasn’t handreared.
But one day as I sat at my desk, he climbed up beside me and out of nowhere said, “Hello.”
THE CONSTANT PRESENCE
Until then, he had been completely silent, besides the usual screaming and chatters. That single, casual word felt miraculous – a breakthrough after so much trial and error.
From then on, his vocabulary grew slowly, and each new word was like finding hidden treasure, especially since his voice mimicked my own.
The way Lee came into my life still feels like fate. For some time, I had been preparing to adopt a quiet little Green Cheek Conure; instead, I was blessed with this vibrant, talkative Indian Ringneck. It was not initially what I had planned, so I was a bit hesitant at first. However, as time went by, it was plain to see that he was exactly what I needed.
For years, we spent the majority of our days together. From morning until evening, we had a routine that we spent side by side. Every day as I worked from home, he’d perch on top of my screen or play inside his enclosure just beside my chair.
It was impossible not to think of him everywhere I looked.
THE LOSS
Losing him was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. His passing was sudden and came with no warning. Compared to my other pets who had grown old or fallen ill, Lee was here one moment and gone the next.
With him, I wasn’t able to emotionally prepare for the worst.
To make things harder, he was living with my family at the time, since I had recently moved out after getting married. I could only see him once or twice a week. He kept my family company. But not being there for his final moments left an ache I can’t put into words, and I regret I might never get over his passing.
THE AFTERMATH
Visiting my mom’s house afterward was heartbreaking. The silence where his chatter used to be was unbearable.
Whenever I’d visit him when he was still with us, we’d play for hours and he’d fly around the house following me. He would eat lunch with my family and hang around by the couch.
Even watching old videos of him and looking at his goofy photos, once a source of joy, became too painful. Every reminder cut deeply, and I kept wishing I had been there more for him.
A few weeks after his aquamation, I received his remains. Holding them was when reality truly hit – he was gone.
I was stuck in grief for weeks. Then, one day, my husband told me about a memorial jewelry brand called Tender Foot Jewels. They create memorial keepsakes from ashes, fur, feathers, or other materials that contain an animal companion’s DNA.
That was when it clicked: While Lee could no longer sit on my shoulder, maybe I could still carry him with me.
THE RINGNECK RING
Before he passed, I was eagerly planning to buy him a Bird backpack so that we could travel around together.
Unfortunately, that dream never came true. Thanks to this simple piece of jewelry, in a way, I get to do that with him – perhaps not in body, but at least in spirit.
Tender Foot Jewels created a ring and bracelet from some of his ashes and feathers. I asked for something simple – no frills, no sparkle, no flash; just a timeless piece. What they delivered was perfect. The ring was elegant, classic, and – most importantly to me – absolutely priceless.
The first time I wore it, I cried for hours. But behind those tears was comfort. Tiny white feathers inside the ring reminded me of the way they used to float around the room during his molts and I’d find them all over my clothes.
Now, instead of sadness, those feathers make me smile.
Since I got the ring, I’ve been wearing it almost everyday. I’m glad the design goes with almost everything and, even better, when I glance at it, sometimes I can still see him sitting on my shoulder, so much so that I can practically feel him nibbling at my ear or softly preening my hair like the good ol’ days.
THE HEALING MEMENTO
Although it sounds cheesy, having this ring helped me process my grief. Instead of being down so much and filled with regret, I began to slowly accept that in some strange way, Lee isn’t truly gone; he just looks a little different now.
As of writing this, his ashes are now placed inside a small white urn on my desk right next to where he used to perch while I worked. A painting of him with a tiny halo sits nearby. And whenever I glance at my ring, I feel my best friend’s spirit with me.
THE LESSONS LEARNED
To some, losing a Bird like Lee may not sound like much. People have told me to get over it since “it’s just a Bird,” and that I should “just buy a new one.” But to anyone who has truly loved an animal companion, it’s not that simple.
They’re not just animals. They’re our companions – our best friends and members of the family. The grief of losing them can be every bit as raw and heartbreaking as losing any human loved one.
So, to anyone who’s mourning their pet: Go through the grief and feel the pain. Cry whenever you miss them and take time. No need to feel like you have to replace them; miss them with your whole heart. That’s not weakness, that’s pure love.
The silence will be heavy at first, and for months you might cry randomly. But with time, it’ll get easier. And finding a way to honor them, whether through memorial jewelry or any other keepsake, can turn sorrow into something you can carry with you everywhere.
Lee was my first Bird – my angel with beautiful white and blue wings, my best friend, someone I’ll never really get over. Our time together was too short but full of meaning, and I’ll forever be grateful for him.
Even writing this article helps me process the heartbreak, and thanks to my ring, he’ll always be with me every step of the way.
HOW DOES A KEEPSAKE HELP WITH GRIEF?
Having a keepsake made from your animal companion’s remains…
- Can help you keep a lasting connection with them
- Gives your keepsake a personal touch, since it is crafted from their ashes, feathers, or fur
- Can give you something elegant to wear everyday
- Is a way to celebrate their life
